Even if I Never See You Again
by Tsubame-go
Summary: Even though I'll probably never see you again, I love you." Set in Valeria a bit before Fai and Yuui were sent to the valley where time flows at a different pace, at least that's when it starts. Faixoc. T rated just to be safe.
1. Smile

**Disclaimer: Tsubasa Chronicle and it's characters belong to CLAMP and only CLAMP, the only character I own in this story is Miyu-chan**

**Please note that Yuui is the twin that survived, so I therefore listed that Fai was in this story  
**

**Enough said! story time! ^^**

A snow flake fell onto my arm as I walked into the deserted courtyard which was covered in a blanket of snow, I had never been to this part of the city, despite it's closeness to my home. I was raised a girl of noble rank, my family's estate was right next to the palace of the Valerian royal family; my hair was long back then, it almost reached my ankles... my eyes are still ice-blue though, perhaps one of the few things that hasn't changed. I was very young then, barely four years old, maybe that's why I had never been to this courtyard.

I looked up to see the royal palace, a side of it that i had never seen before, this side seemed less royal than all the other angles of the palace i had seen, like it hadn't been repaired in decades, some of the stones in the wall were loose an d if I looked in the window it seemed that the inside of the palace was dusty. Even the courtyard benches seemed old and broken down, like no one had been there in years, I looked up once more, this time I could see some one at the window, a blond-haired boy who couldn't be older than me. The look in his eyes was sad, like he was all alone in this world, those sapphire blue eyes made me want to talk to him, find out why he was so sad and if I could, help him to find happiness. Then something unexpected happened, he smiled at me; it was a sad smile, but a smile none the less I wanted to climb the palace wall and embrace him right then, and I almost did.

"Miyuki!" from somewhere in my mind i heard my mother calling me, her voice sounded like I had done something wrong or gone somewhere I wasn't supposed to go I look back up at the window to see if the boy was still there, but he was nowhere to be seen. Since I didn't want to be in any more trouble than I already might be in, I hastened to my mother's side. "Don't go there again Miyu-chan," she scolded, but as she had used my nick-name I figured it was alright now.

But the look in the boy's eye's haunted my mind, I wondered if he was a servant or royalty and why he looked so sad; I was distracted the rest of the day, my mother even asked if I wasn't feeling well, so I guess she must have been worried. After that day I knew one thing, I had to find out why that boy was so sad.

I couldn't sleep that night, the boy's face lingered in my mind, part of me wished I had never seen him and part of me wanted to hold him close. If not anything else I knew I had to return to the courtyard, I left as soon as I was sure my family was asleep. A cold breeze tickled my skin as I found my way back to the courtyard; I still don't know how I got there, it was like something deeply engraved in my heart was leading me there. When I reached the courtyard I looked up at the window, but my heart sank as I saw that no one was there. Suddenly I felt someone's hand on my shoulder, I turned around quickly and to my astonishment there he was.

"I knew you'd come back," he murmured, his voice barely a whisper, the all of a sudden he grasped my hand and began to run. I could barely keep up with his pace, but I tried as hard as I could to keep up with him, just when it seemed I couldn't run any more he came to an sudden stop. "Have you heard of the unhappy twins?" he asked as soon as I had caught my breath, his voice was a bit louder now, as if he was safer here. I nodded, remembering everything my mother had told me about the twin princes doomed to despair. "Well I'm one of them," I said with a sad smile, at that moment it was all I could do to keep from dissolving into tears, it must of shown on my face, cause he looked like he wanted to apologize even though he hadn't done anything wrong. "It's Miyuki, right?" he paused, "Actually this is the second time I've been out of the castle."

"R-Really?" I couldn't help but stutter, I still felt like crying; at that moment he looked so sad, and for a reason unknown to me then, his eyes seemed to break my heart.

"Do you hate me for being the cause of the recent misfortunes of Valeria?" he asked with the same smile and the same sad look in those sapphire blue eyes that I had seen that day.

"Of course not!" I wailed, "You aren't the cause of misfortune, your a normal boy!" his eyes grew wide at my sudden out burst, then he smiled what seemed to be a genuine smile.

"My name is Yuui," he told me, "I'll probably never see you again, but I'm glad I met you, Miyuki." And with those last words he vanished as suddenly as he had appeared. I somehow found my way back home, that night I slept soundly, I felt relived that I might have seen Yuui smile from his heart despite his sad fate.

**That's the end of chapter 1! if any angelic person bothers to review this Miyu-chan and I will love** **you forever ^^**

**XOXO Tsubame-go  
**


	2. Transions

**Disclaimer: Tsubasa Chronicle and it's characters belong to CLAMP and only CLAMP, the only characters I own in this story is Miyu-chan and Elmara  
**

**The second chapter is up at last! This one isn't all that interesting but I wanted to try not to have any gaps in the story. I promise the next chapter will be more interesting  
**

When I look back at the the year that followed my encounter with Yuui I find that I have only a hand full of memories. I remember the day my mother told me the fate of the unhappy twins, I never showed her how saddened I was at how tragic their fate was; though I know I couldn't hide all of my sorrow. I remember the continued catastrophes, which continued to be blamed on Yuui and his brother. Lastly, I remember my fifth birthday, when in the middle of the celebration my mother told me that there had been another mishap and everyone had to go home immediately. Later that day she shared these words with me:

"Miyuki, the sovereign has been driven into insanity by the continuation of disasters, despite the removal of the unhappy twins. He has begun executing innocent people, so we fear for our lives; Miyuki, I don't want you to be murdered by his insanity. Our family will soon be taking a trip to Celes, I want you to stay there. if a noble lady like myself were to vanish it would be noticed to easily, but if you are to disappear most people would not realize you had gone."Strangely, I didn't feel sad to leave home; I could only wish that somehow Yuui and his brother could have escape to some other country before they had been sent to that spooky valley of which my mother had told my little of. I simply packed what little i wanted to keep and what I needed.

On the day before we would leave for Celes my mother cut my hair so short it barely reached my shoulders, she merely told me that I should change my appearance so I wouldn't be recognized by anyone who somehow knew me. Perhaps my hair was the thing I valued most of that which I left in Valeria, I felt cold the first night I spent with my hair so short. I don't recall much about the day we departed, I remember going back to that snow covered abandoned courtyard where I had first seen Yuui. I remember gazing up at the window for where I'd seen his sad smile, wishing he could somehow be there once more.

Four long months had passed since my birthday when I saw the place that would be my new home. It was an orphanage, though I was not an orphan at the time; it was a large building, almost as large as our estate in Valeria, though at the time it seemed much larger. We were greeted by a plump woman with a friendly face and wispy gray-brown hair, she smiled at me and told me that she was the manager of the orphanage and her name was Elmara. We were lead into a large room full of couches and comfy-looking chairs; I couldn't help but notice a piano in the far corner of the room. A bit before I turned five I had taken some piano lessons, I had had loved playing the piano and my teacher had told me I had a talent for it. I couldn't help but go over to it and examine those ivory keys that looked like a dance floor to my fingers. I said my good-byes to my parents and moved my belongings into the room which I was to sleep in. The room had lavender walls and a forest green carpet, in one corner was a mahogany bunk bed in which both beds had baby-blue comforters and white sheets. My eye met the of blue eyes of a blond boy sitting up right on the bottom bunk that looked a bit older than me.

"I thought rooms weren't co-ed." I remarked with a puzzled air in my voice.

"They aren't," he replied coolly

"Then why are you here," I said in a voice that was a bit too demanding.

"No need to be so uptight about it, I was merely wondering why someone like yourself, whose parents are still among the living is here." he inquired.

"If I stayed with my parents I'd be at high risk of death, so now that you know why I'm here could you please exit this room," I told him in a voice that made it clear that this subject was not to be discussed.

"Gladly," he smiled, "I'll never turn down a girl's request, though you do make me curious." With that last remark the boy left me to my peace and quiet. _I wonder_ _who that bed really belongs to_, I thought, _I hope I'll meet them soon_. I looked around the room, the only furnishings other than the bed that I could see where a table, two chairs, a comfy looking chair and a bed side table on which was a fan. I heard footsteps in the hallway, as if in answer to my thoughts, a girl with gray eyes and a high pony-tail of raven black hair entered the room.

"Oh!" she exclaimed as she caught sight of me, "are you the new girl?" I merely nodded and examined the girl from up to down. She wore a white long sleeve shirt with an orange vest and a matching orange skirt.

"I'm Chun'yan" she informed me, "it looks like we're roommates."

"My name is Miyuki," I told her quietly, I was a bit intimidated by her talkativeness. "How many children live here?" I decided to start with a simple question she would probably easily answer, I've never been good with conversations, so I figured that asking something non-personal if I didn't want to risk offending Chun'yan.

"Oh there's at least thirty of us," she said casually and flopped down onto the bottom bunk where the boy had been sitting earlier. "It's already dark," she stated, glancing at the rooms only window, which was right above the table. "I'm going to bed," Chun'yan announced and wasted not a another second of time as she got herself ready for slumber.

**That's all until the third chapter! please reveiw!**


	3. Reunion

**Disclaimer: Tsubasa Chronicle and it's characters belong to CLAMP and only CLAMP, the only character I own in this story is Miyuki**

******Chapter three is finished already! I probably won't be able to update so frequently since I go back to school tomorrow.**

******Enough! Story time!  
**

"Why are you always so cold?" Nokoru's blue eyes met mine just like they had my first day at the orphanage.

"Cold?" _am I cold? _his words hit me hard.

"Yeah, you always seem to be in a unfriendly mood and you haven't made a single friend here even though you've lived here for almost seven years."

Yes, it had been seven years, I realized; it seemed as if I had barely spent a year in this place, but then again time moves fast. The image of Yuui's face flashed into my mind, I could have burst into tears right then, but I refused to let myself cry in front of Nokoru.  
"Is it about your parents? You come from Valeria, don't you?" he paused. "I heard about what happened in Valeria..." his voice trailed off, he obviously expected me to respond in some expression of emotion.

"Please don't be so nosy," I told him in a voice free of all expression except exasperation.

"I can never refuse a lady's request," he ended the conversation in the same gentlemanly manor that he had seven years ago, and left just as I had asked. _Has it really been seven years _I wondered, not a day had passed when I had not recalled Yuui's smile. It was true that I had not made a single friend at the orphanage, unless you count the piano. I the last seven years playing the piano had been perhaps what kept me going, what kept me from falling into despair.

That afternoon I found myself in the courtyard of the orphanage, gazing into the distance, towards the royal palace of Celes, which appeared minuscule at this distance. I was standing at the edge of the court yard, which happened to also be the edge of a icy chasm. Of course, this was a very dangerous place to be standing, not that I cared of course, but apparently Chun'yan did.

"Miyuki, get away from the edge!" she called out to me, I could tell that she was trying to conceal her fear. Then as if Chun'yan's voice had added to my weight, the ice beneath me tumbled away.

I didn't cry out as I fell, but I heard Chun'yan's scream of terror as I plummeted down. I was actually rather enjoying my fall, I wasn't afraid I would die when I reached the bottom, because somehow I knew this plummet was slower than it should be. I hit the ground almost lightly, I instantly looked up to see that abnormally light chunk of ice right above me. An abundance of Ice and snow fell upon me, I felt sharp pain cut into my left leg, then I suddenly lost consciousness.

When I regained consciousness the first thing I noticed was I was no longer covered in ice and snow, someone was carrying me. My eyes opened, they met a pair of sapphire blue eyes, at first I thought it couldn't be true, but as my eyes inspected the other features of his face I knew it had to be.

"Miyuki?!" His eyes widened, he somehow recognized me.

"Yuui?" His eyes filled with sorrow, I wondered if this despair in his eyes was my fault. But he smiled sadly and nodded as if he was fine. Finally, he spoke.

"Actually, I'm known by my brothers name now." I searched my memories from his brother's name, after a moment I realized it had been Fai.

"Fai..." my voice trailed off.

"How did you possibly escape Valeria?" he asked softly. Then everything spilled out, everything that had happened to me since I'd met him. He simply listened to everything I sad, not saying a word. I realized that we were going up out of the chasm by the will of some magic that must be Fai's.

"You don't like the orphanage?" he asked me once I had finished my tale.

"I have no opinion of it, actually," I corrected

"Then you'd rather live somewhere else?"

"Possibly," I answered, I tried to read into his intentions, but couldn't; I knew he must have some reason for asking me this question. When we reached the courtyard a small crowd of children gathered around me, Fai set me back on my feet, but my left leg gave out. Immediately Fai helped to my feet and put an arm around my shoulder to help support me. I saw Nokoru's face in the crowd, there was a gleam in his eye's, as if he had found some valuable piece of information about me.

**That's the end of chapter three! please review!**


	4. Home

**Whoohoo! chapter four is up! I'd like to dedicate this chapter to the wonderful kim-onka, without her reveiws I probably wouldn't have had the motivation to update this story.**

I sat at the piano, my eyes closed tight, trying to remember the last note of my favorite song. It was unlike me to forget a note to any song let alone my favorite song! but somehow as hard as I tried I couldn't recall that one note.

I had virtually lived at the piano for the last week due to my injured left leg. Playing music was fun, and it kept me busy so no one could ask me about Fai. Speaking of Fai, I hadn't seen him since I had injured my leg; I wanted to see him, to hear his voice say my name. E! the last note of the song was E! I knew it was! Just to make sure, I played the last line of the song and it fit perfectly. I let out a sigh of relief, my forgetfulness was gone.

"Miyuki!" I heard Miss Elmara calling my name. "Miyuki, there's some one here to see you!"

I jumped to my feet, unfortunately, my left leg gave out and I fell to the floor. I let out a groan of humiliation, glad no one had seen me fall. I grabbed my crutch and hobbled over to where I heard miss Elmara's voice coming from.

"There you are, Miyuki!" I barely heard her voice; my eyes were focused upon the person behind her.

"Fai-san is here to see you." Elmara finished, immediately I felt ashamed that Fai had to see me injured, it wasn't just that, I had only just recovered from a cold, so I was still pale. Fai gave me a small bow.

"Hello, Miyuki-chan!" he said cheerfully.

"Greetings, Fai-san." I felt awkward around Fai, despite how much I had wanted to see him. Now I felt so shy with Fai, as if he were a stranger.

I decided to play the piano for him, since I felt too self conscious to make conversation. I started by playing a song I knew well, so the odds of me making a mistake were low, I played the piece slower than i usually do, so mistakes were practically impossible.

When I finished he applauded loudly, I was so nervous that his applause might make the other children notice his presence, but there was no one to be seen.

"Hyuuu!" he continued to applaud.

"Huh?"

"I can't whistle so I say hyuuu," Fai explained, I laughed. I felt less awkward now, like we were old friends; not that I would know what it's like to have old friends, Fai is pretty much the only friend I've ever had.

We broke into conversation, Fai seemed so cheerful that I didn't want to ask how he had escaped his fate for fear it would take his cheerfulness. It was so nice to finally be able to have a long conversation with him; I wished that he wouldn't ever leave me again.

"Time to go," Fai said abruptly.

"So soon?" I asked in dismay.

"I gotta go back to the castle," he explained "Ashura-ou will be waiting."

"Oh," I tried to hide my disipointment. "Good bye."

"Didn't I tell you? your coming back to the castle with me! Ashura-ou want to treat your leg." I was dumbstruck.

"R-really?"

"Yup!" Fai smiled, "come on, let's go!" He offer me his arm, I took up my crutch and stood up. "You won't be needing that," he said indicating my crutch, I was confused, how would I walk? "You don't like that crutch, do you?" he had practically read my mind. "I'll carry you so you don't need a crutch!" I smiled. We traveled to the palace via Fai's magic, he carried me piggy back style.

"Ashura-ou, this is Miyuki-chan." Fai told the king then dropped down into a low bow, I followed suite. King Ashura-ou was tall and he had a kind expression on his face, even though he was king I didn't feel a bit nervous around him like I often do when I meet new people.

"Show Miyuki-san to her room, Fai," Ashura-ou instructed. "I will treat her leg tomorrow morning."

Fai rose back up to his feet and once again lifted me on to his back, he gave the king one last respectful nod then began to climb a flight of stairs.

"Isn't it hard to carry me up all these stairs?" I asked once he was climbing the third set of stairs.

"Nah, this is the last flight any way," he replied cheerfully as we reached the top.

We entered a hallway with light blue walls and white carpet, there were four doors on each side of the hall, each painted with beautiful blue and white designs and silver door knobs.

Fai stopped at the second door at the right side of the hall. "This is your room," He announced as he opened the door. "I'm just across the hall, so don't be afraid to ask if you need anything."

He set me down on the bed in my room and said Ashura-ou needed him and left. The room was like my old room in Valeria, it had a white and gold canopy over the bed which had blue covers with elaborate designs on them. the walls were blue and the floor was white, there was a white doored closet in one corner of the room. That was when I realized it, this place was home. More of a home than any of the other places I had lived.

**That's it for chapter four! please review!**


	5. Forever

**Disclaimer: Tsubasa Chronicle and it's characters belong to CLAMP and only CLAMP, the only character I own in this story is Miyuki**

******I'm alive! chapter five is finally done! this chapter has a nice bit of foreboding in it, I hope you enjoy it! **  


* * *

"You're healed," Ashura-ou told me casually as he lifted his hand from my ankle.

"That quick?" I wondered aloud, my eyes wide.

"Magic usually tends to hasten things," the king elaborated.

"Does this mean I have to go back to orphanage?" I asked him anxiously, my voice coated with worry, despite how hard I tried to hide it.

"Only if you want to," he responded kindly. "You can stay here forever if it pleases you." I broke into a smile.

"I'd like that."

* * *

"I'm not going back," I informed Fai once back in my room. We were almost always side by side now, we only parted when we had to. Fai had even used his magic to move his room beside mine and create a door connecting us. Ashura-ou had threatened Fai by saying if he even slept in my room he would personally magically move Fai's ten floors above mine and seal it there so Fai could counter act it with his own magic.

"Whoohooo!" Fai cheered. "Miyu-chan isn't going away!" The young mage added jubilantly.

"Ashura-ou said he doesn't care if I stay here forever as long as I'm happy," I told him with a smile. "And that's exactly what intend to do!"

Looking back on that moment I wonder if my twelve-year old self even knew what 'forever' meant. Back then I couldn't even imagine that things could turn out as tragic as they did, it was probably better that way anyways.

We spent the rest of the day telling jokes and playing ridiculous games, I wished that things could have been like that forever. I hadn't been so happy in all my life! I was with Fai, and at the time I didn't even realize I loved him. Now sometimes I wish I could turn back the hands of time and tell him how I felt right then, then perhaps I might of really spend 'forever' with him.

* * *

"Miyu-chaaaan!" Fai's voice woke me from slumber.

"Wha?" I stumble with my words, I've never been a morning person,so in the mornings I often have trouble speaking.

"It's time for breakfast!" he told my with his voice filled to the brim with cheer. I opened my eyes to see his smile, a genuine one, like it was most of time those days. Slowly, I sat up and rubbed my tired eyes.

"I'm coming, I'm coming!" I retorted, glints of playful frustration in my eyes. I never bothered to change out of my night cloths, preferring to change just after breakfast, as I always did. We rushed down fours flights of steps to reach the level on which the kitchen was located. We rushing through the door like a flood of water, grabbed those delicate white plates with ornate gold designs painted upon them, pile our plates with soft, white rolls and butter, then scarfing them down at the small beat-up table in the corner of the kitchen.

We rarely ate breakfast with Ashura-ou, we preferred raiding the kitchens to a formal breakfast. Sometimes we got stomach cramps from the speed we ate at, but we never truly regretted our light-speed eating habits. After I was clothed in the appropriate attire, we would visit a petite village a few miles away. The villagers there were so kind to us, we'd usually stay there 'til late after noon. There was a woman in the village that we were particularly close to, she went by the name of Nadeshika and she was in her late twenties. She had a husband, who was almost always traveling so we rarely saw him. She also had a daughter who's name I can't recall, she wasn't more than four years old.

We would return to the palace a couple hours before sunset, eat dinner with Ashura-ou, and stay up talking until one of the servants came in and told us that Ashura-ou wanted to tell us that if we didn't go to bed that instant he would magically move my room to the top floor of the palace and Fai's to the bottom floor. Though we always went strait to bed, we knew that Ashura-ou would never do anything of the sort.

I thought this would be my forever. I couldn't have been more delusional.

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**That's it for Chapter five! This story will probably only have about two or three more chapters, please review!**


	6. Seperation

**Disclaimer:**** Tsubasa Chronicle and it's characters belong to CLAMP and only CLAMP, the only character I own in this story is Miyuki**

**Whoohoo! Chapter six is here so soon! speaking of soon, my birthday is on the 18th! **

**This story will hopefully be finished by the end of the weekend!  
**

* * *

It took me a year to realize I loved Fai, I still can't believe I didn't identify my feelings sooner. It just sorta dawned on me one day that how I felt about Fai was called love. "_I love him!"_ that thought echoed in my mind for days on end, always followed by the thought "_does he love me?" _but that was a question I had no answers for.

One morning as I sat by the window rays of sun light filtered softly into my room. As usual I was thinking about Fai, who at the time was out assisting a village ten miles away from Luval Castle. I was so absorbed in my thoughts I didn't even notice Ashura-ou enter the room.

"Miyuki-san?" his voice startled me.

"Yes Ashura-ou?" I answer uneasily, Ashura-ou rarely spoke to me other than at dinner, so I had knew something was up. The king reached into his robes and pulled out an empty glass.

"Try concentrating on this goblet," he told me. "Imagine it is full." Not knowing what else to do, I focused intently of the tumbler, I imagined it full of hot, brown liquid. I closed my eye and thought of nothing else, not even Fai. When my eyes opened the glass was full of steaming hot brown liquid. My jaw fell open, had Ashura-ou read my mind and used his magic to make my thoughts reality? Just as I was about to ask him that he vanished.

that incident bothered me, what was the the king's reason for such an 'experiment'? I wondered. I didn't even tell Fai about the incident, I now realize that I was afraid to inform him. I think he knew something was up, though; for his eyes looked at me with suspicion as we chatted after dinner that night. Perhaps it would have been better if I had told him then, but then again it might have shortened our time together. Honestly, I don't know what I should have done, all I do know is that the incident set what was impossible to avoid into motion.

Fai and I were parted more and more often as Fai had his duties as a magician to attend to, due to this, I was left alone more and more. I was so lonely then, and, though I never realized it, so was Fai. How many times did I sit alone, consumed by my thoughts, for hours on end?

Ashura-ou performed several more of his 'experiments', which disturbed me, and made me even lonelier. The sad thing was I didn't even realize my own loneliness! in fact I was hardly aware of my own feelings most of the time. But perhaps it was better that way, perhaps that's why I didn't become depressed just then; at least, I hadn't fallen into despair just yet.

Sometimes I would cry after Ashura-ou disappeared, I knew he would never do anything to hurt me, but our encounters still bothered me. Fai grew busier and busier, I fell farther and farther into my state of confusion. We were drifting apart and neither of us could stop it, despite how painful it was.

"You're ill," Ashura-ou told me one day as I sat alone. I had grown rather pale and I hadn't been eating quite as much as I used to, so I must have been a bit skinny.

"Am I?" I wandered aloud, not quite realizing I was speaking aloud.

"You are." He said it so bluntly it almost hurt. Then it happened, I passed out.

* * *

When I regained consciousness I could hear voices out side the room, I immediately recognized Fai's voice then realized the other belonged to Ashura-ou. They were arguing, this surprised me as I had never heard them argue before; I could quite make out what they were saying, though I heard the words "Contagious," "not instantaneously cured by magic," "Do I look like I care?" and "You can't see her 'til she's better."

I was scared, so very scared. Was I really that sick? if only could have known that it was not sickness that ailed me, it was something else entirely. I broke down into tears, thoughts racing through my mind at the speed of light. How long would I be contagious and therefor not permitted to see Fai. It was worse than when I was at the orphanage, he was just out of my reach.

I made up mind to tell him I loved him when or if I saw him again, tell him I couldn't bear to be drifting apart, tell him i needed him.

Weeks passed, I was still unwell. Ashura-ou would treat me with magic, but my illness didn't cease. I felt fine, but the king told me it wasn't safe to see Fai, after a month I began to fall into depression.

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**That's all for chapter six! The next chapter will be the last one! The title of the next chapter is Darkness! please read it when I update! please review this chapter!**

**XOXO Tsubame-go  
**


	7. Darkness

**Disclaimer: Tsubasa Chronicle and it's characters belong to CLAMP and only CLAMP, the only character I own in this story is Miyuki**

**This is the last chapter, I'd like to thank you for following this story until the end. Hopefully I'll start another multichapter story soon.  
**

* * *

A month passed, Ashura-ou told me I was still to sick to see Fai, when in fact I'd never felt better, the king kept treating my illness with magic, even though it seemed to drain him. I wanted the Ashura-ou to stop using his magic on me so much he looked very sick himself, I wanted to see Fai and I didn't believe I was sick at all. But that room was kept magically locked so securely Fai couln't budge the door with all of his magic, I heard him trying practically every day. Sometimes I would hear him arguing with Ashura-ou, he sounded so desperate in his arguments, and that made me a bit happy.

The worst of it was when I was left all alone, only then would I allow myself to cry, I even tried to find a knife to cut myself to relieve the pain once, but there were no sharp objects to be found. Sleep was almost as bad as solitude, my dreams were chaotic, I would always see faces, sometimes Fai's, sometimes my mother's, sometimes Ashura-ou's and sometimes I would even see the face of Nadeshika's daughter. I remember that I once saw a face I didn't know at the time, _your face,_ identical to Fai's, but very different, too. It was follow by a rain of blood, drenching the ground until it became a flood, when I gasped for air my throat filled with warm blood. I saw your lifeless body in the ocean of crimson blood, just as I though I was dieing your eyes opened, and that was it, I woke up.

After that dream something strange came over me, I got right out of bed and opened the door that Ashura-ou had so tightly locked, yes, opened when all Fai magic had been useless. I didn't gap at my accomplishment in astonishment like I normally would have, I walked to an unknown destination. When I reached Fai he was glazing into what appeared to be a pool, I glanced in to the sight of a terribly beautiful person encased in flourite at the bottom of the pool, or in other words, you. Fai's face had sorrow written all over it, he murmured "it should have been me" under his breath. He looked up, astonishment and wonder crossed his face.

"Miyuki!" his cry echoed through the deserted chamber. I smiled, I knew what I had to do right then, everything made sense. "Did Ashura-ou let you out?"

I shook my head, a shadow fell across Fai's face. "I escaped." I told him simply, his eye's narrowed.

"How? Why?"

"I don't know how," I lied. "but I do know why, it's because I love you." I paused, "I can't stand to be separated from you for any longer." I fought to keep my tears in as a look of astonishment and delight swept across Fai.

"I love you too," He smiled, "I've always loved you, Miyuki." And with those words he swept me into a gentle kiss, my first kiss, and my last kiss. You began to rise from the depths of the water, I concentrated on your eyes opening, my lips still interlocked with Fai's. "_I don't have much time, I have to do this fast!_" I thought, then it happened, a sharp, hot pain in my back, I felt my warm blood gush out of my wound as I saw your eyes begin to open. But as soon as they were half open my ability to concentrate ceased and your eyes were shut once more, you fell back into the depths of the pool, I had failed. Fai was crying now, we were both covered in blood, my blood. he dropped to his knees and I, unable to hold myself up any more, followed him down, we were both crying now. The knife slipped out of Fai's hand, its glistening silver blade was stained with my blood.

"Miyuki..." his voice, barely a whisper, was tainted with shock and anguish. "I'm so sorry..."

I forced a smile through my tears. "Good bye, Fai," I struggled to speak, "even though I'll probably never see you again, I love you." My eyes shut, and everything faded into darkness.

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So here I am now, with you, in this place of eternal darkness; like you, I can't move on, I wait here, in hope of the impossible: That Yuui will pass through here when he dies. We're quite alike, you and I; both waiting for Yuui's death, not that we want him to die before his time, or anything.

People have passed through here on their way to the other side before, but it is a rare occurrence we only experience once a year if we're lucky.

I'm sorry I failed, Fai. I would have died anyway, but you were supposed to return to the life, if only your eyes had opened before Yuui's curse claimed me. If only I could have succeeded in transferring what life I had to you before Yuui's curse took affect. Then I could have granted Yuui's deepest wish: for you to come back.

I'm such a fool, as much as I love Yuui I couldn't grant his one wish. With all my magic I couldn't do what I most wished to, at heart I'm still just a stupid girl who loves your brother more than anything but couldn't do anything for him. We'll probably never see Yuui again any way, you'll move on soon anyway, you can be at peace like you deserve soon. As for me, I'll probably be here forever; and forever sure doesn't mean what I used to think it would.

**The End

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**That's the end of this story! I can't believe it's already finished! please review!**

**XOXO Tsubame-go**


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